As a teacher in a primary school, I recently encountered a troubling issue that highlighted a growing problem: nappy-changing responsibilities in schools. One day, a mother forgot to provide her son with spare clothes and nappies. She promised to return within the hour, but time passed, and there was still no sign of her. It was disheartening when she responded with, “I don’t have time! He’s at school, so it’s your problem now.” This incident shed light on the increasing issue among affluent families.
Nappy-changing is not a primary teacher’s responsibility, especially when the child is not a toddler but a six-year-old. It may surprise you to hear that some mothers send their children to school without proper toilet training. Sadly, this nonchalant attitude is becoming more common, particularly among affluent families. In my school, located in a well-to-do middle-class town in the south of England, we have a fully equipped changing station provided by the school budget. It is not unique to my school; most primary schools require these facilities.
During my 11 years of teaching, I have come across children aged from four to seven who are not yet toilet-trained almost every day. In the incident mentioned earlier, my teaching assistant had to purchase appropriately sized nappies from a local supermarket for the embarrassed six-year-old. Situations like this are why teachers like me are concerned about the increasing number of children arriving at school without proper toilet training.
Shona Sibary’s recent confession added to this concern. She admitted to sending her four-year-old to school without proper potty training, hoping for the best. MP Miriam Cates blamed overworked mothers for the rise in older children still wearing nappies at school. Shona expressed guilt about her decision but failed to recognize the frustration and burden it places on teachers.
I’m only 33 years old, and yet, I have changed hundreds of nappies in the schools where I have worked. It is ironic and troubling that, as a non-parent, I have more nappy-changing experience than some parents.
Parenting experts suggest that children are ready for toilet training between the ages of two and three. However, a recent report revealed that 90 percent of reception teachers, like me, have children in their class who are not toilet-trained. This issue goes beyond a simple change of clothes; it disrupts lessons, requires contacting parents, and needs permission. On average, I spend four to five hours a week dealing with this issue, time that could be better spent on teaching.
The burden of nappy-changing is not only time-consuming but also affects the rest of the class, especially students who require extra attention. These children need our full focus, yet they often get neglected while we handle the basics of keeping everyone clean.
When I chose to become a teacher, I envisioned a fulfilling career working with children. However, as the years went by, I felt that I had less time to teach due to the increasing burden of nappy-changing.
Interestingly, this issue is not limited to children from disadvantaged backgrounds. It is often middle-class parents who expect the educational system to take care of nappy-changing, as they are accustomed to having nannies and au pairs. These parents come from various professions, including doctors, nurses, finance, and the civil service. They frequently drop off their children late, causing added stress for their kids.
Face-to-face communication with these parents is rare because they claim to have no time. When I do manage to speak with them, I emphasize the importance of life skills, including toilet training. I try to convey that toilet training requires their full attention and offer tips for encouragement. Unfortunately, many parents respond with “I’m too busy!”
It’s bewildering to think that parents can be too busy to teach such a basic skill that profoundly impacts their child’s physical and emotional development. Why do some parents believe that this crucial responsibility falls more on teachers than on themselves, their child’s primary caregivers?
The burden of nappy-changing falls disproportionately on teachers. If every child in a class turned up without proper potty training, teachers would spend a significant portion of their time changing them, leaving less time for essential academic instruction.
To parents who believe that nappy-changing is solely a teacher’s job, I say this: I teach a class of 30 students. Even changing one child takes up a significant portion of my time that should be dedicated to teaching them essential skills like reading, spelling, and counting. While toilet training may seem mundane, it is a fundamental part of parenting. Ensuring your child’s happiness, confidence, and overall development should be motivation enough.
In conclusion, the burden of nappy-changing in schools is a growing concern, and teachers like me are increasingly frustrated by the lack of parental responsibility in this area. It’s time for parents to recognize their role in toilet training and understand that neglecting this responsibility not only hinders their child’s development but also places an unnecessary burden on teachers. If we want our education system to focus on teaching academic skills, we must address this issue and encourage parents to take the lead in toilet training their children.
