We all face unusual and unexpected problems in life, and sometimes these issues can be challenging to navigate, especially when they involve family. In a recent incident, a teenager took to Reddit to seek advice on how she handled a situation where her father was cheating on her mother. Although everyone in the immediate family seemed to be aware of the situation, no one was addressing it.
The young girl decided to confront her father publicly at a large family gathering, but things quickly took a turn for the worse. Not everyone supported her approach, leading her to question whether she was in the wrong.
Let me explain the situation.
My relationship with my dad has never been the best. He’s always been absent, working long hours and going on frequent business trips due to his high-ranking job at a bank. My mom has been the one raising my siblings and me, and I am very close to her. Our conversations with my dad are usually about my underwhelming grades and his disappointment in me. As a result, I try to avoid being around him.
As I grew older (I’m 16 now), I began noticing my dad’s strange behavior. A few months ago, he came home very late, and I could smell perfume on him. I didn’t think much of it until I saw a text notification on his phone one day. The message read, “last night was amazing, can’t wait to see you again,” followed by a string of cringeworthy emojis. I was shocked when I read that. I immediately told my mom about what I saw, but she didn’t seem surprised. She became emotional, which made me feel guilty. She reassured me not to worry and to focus on being a teenager while she handled the rest. So, I let it go because I didn’t want to hurt her any further.
Now, let’s talk about what happened at the family gathering. There was a big dinner at my grandparents’ house, and during the meal, my cousin announced that he had landed a new job at a software company. Seizing the opportunity, my dad called me out and suggested that I should follow in my cousin’s footsteps and focus more on school. I ignored his comment and continued eating. Then my uncle chimed in, agreeing with my dad and mentioning how difficult it is to connect with young people nowadays. My dad attributed it to a lack of respect, claiming that I had never respected him.
I was exhausted from dealing with his behavior, and without thinking, I retaliated, “It’s hard to respect you when you openly cheat on Mom without even trying to hide it.”
Silence filled the room, and my dad’s anger overflowed. He demanded an explanation from my mom, accusing her of spoiling and ruining me. They began arguing, and despite everyone’s attempts to calm them down, my mom decided that we were leaving. She told my dad not to come home.
On the way back, my phone started buzzing with messages. My cousins in our group chat called me out for publicly disclosing private information. I also received texts and voicemails from uncles, blaming me for destroying my parents’ marriage and advising me to stay out of adult matters. I felt guilty, so I apologized to my mom. She understood my frustration and believed that I should have expressed it privately, but she said that what’s done is done. My dad tried calling me, but I ignored his attempts. He hasn’t come home yet, likely staying at one of his mistress’s houses.
I still feel remorseful about what happened. I only wanted my dad to stop criticizing me and got frustrated by his hypocrisy. Am I the one in the wrong here?
