Ah, first dates. They’re kind of like a box of chocolates—you really never know what you’re going to get. For some, it’s sweet and wonderful, while for others, it’s a bitter bite best spit out immediately. So if you’ve ever felt like your first date was a total trainwreck, buckle up. You’re about to hear stories that will make your experience seem like a fairy tale in comparison.

Ever experienced a date so bad it made you question humanity? We’ve got tales that will leave you both horrified and chuckling at how bizarre dating life can be. Here are some doozies that never should have happened, giving you a new appreciation for your own mishaps.

I’m Glad It’s Over

This gem of a story comes from Reddit. Picture this: a woman meets her potential match, and he spends the first hour unloading his life’s grievances. She doesn’t get a word in edgewise. Clearly unimpressed, she excuses herself to go to the bathroom but instead drives away. Moral of the story: Sometimes, fleeing is the best option.

But wait, it gets better. They make it to the restaurant, and he continues to impress—by boasting about his homeland, ordering her food, and spilling juice while criticizing the staff. When it came time to split the check, he flipped out. She leaves money on the table and walks away, and he still insists on walking her home. She ends it by pushing him away and tossing money at him. His family stopped talking to her after the incident. Good riddance, right?

Making the Exit

Another epic tale involves a dinner date with someone glued to their phone. This hero decides to escape when the waitress brings separate checks. Talk about an exit strategy! The final move? They paid their share and left, feeling triumphant and free.

A Kiss for Two

Here’s a doozy: an 18-year-old in the Air Force goes on a movie date, orchestrated by a buddy. His date brings along a giant stuffed rabbit named Pebbles. After the movie, they get ice cream and head to her cousin’s house. She demands he kiss both her and Pebbles to avoid making the rabbit jealous. Our hero complies, forever questioning his life choices henceforth.

Giving Up

Blind dates are already high-risk, but this one takes the cake. A guy’s friend sets him up, but surprise—she looks nothing like her online photos. To make things better, she brings her parents and nine-year-old brother along to the movie. The kid keeps kicking his seat, and he eventually makes a break for it, skipping out during a ‘bathroom break’ to go home. We’ve all been there, right?

A Strange Request

Oh, the thrill of saving money. A woman is taken aback when her date asks her to pay for her own ticket at the London Zoo while he uses a two-for-one coupon to get in for free. Classy, huh? She agrees to this nonsense. Awkward, much?

A Big Turnoff

This one’s a masterpiece of mischief. Midway through a dinner date, a woman watches in horror as a wedding ring falls out of her companion’s pocket. She throws money on the table and walks out without a word. Sometimes, your gut reaction saves you from a world of trouble.

Where Is the Check?

Last, but not least, a man finds out that his date is engaged. Why is she dating? To confirm if her fiancé is ‘the one.’ He doesn’t wait for an explanation; he demands the check and high-tails it out of there. Smart move, buddy, smart move.

So, the next time you’re sweating over a first date, just remember: it probably won’t be as bad as these. And if it is, at least you’ll have a story worth sharing!