Ah, marriage: the blissful union where two become one, and the age-old art of bickering becomes a professional sport. Now, add to the mix a husband who drops a bombshell right before your best friend’s wedding. Intrigued? Grab your popcorn.
Picture this: our protagonist (let’s call her OP for Original Poster) is all set to shine as the bridesmaid at her BFF’s wedding. Her husband, presumably her plus-one, suddenly decides he won’t attend. The plot thickens when he doesn’t give a single reason and suggests she concoct a lie to cover for his absence!
The Case of the Missing Husband
When your spouse suddenly starts acting unreasonable, it can put you in a difficult position
“My best friend’s getting married, and I’m the bridesmaid! How exciting, right?” said OP, until her husband decided to drop the wedding like it was hot, claiming he had no intention to attend. Reason? Non-existent.
“Just tell them something came up,” he said nonchalantly. Well, if you think she did that, you’d be wrong. OP, with some commendable integrity, decided her hubby should do the dirty work himself. Why lie when you can truthfully let someone else face the music?
Great Plan! Let’s Get Mom Involved
Just a week before, he declared that he was not attending the wedding, and no matter how much she tried, he refused to give any reason
Image credits: Strawberrysaucee
We can’t overlook the fact that weddings are pricey affairs. OP, being a responsible adult, was concerned about the wasted £115 per meal if her husband didn’t show. So, she called up her mom to fill in! Bravo, Mom!
Sulking and Sabotage
He also refused to budge on his decision and asked the poster to come up with a lie to cover for him, but she said she wouldn’t do that and he should tell the bride himself
This is where things get even juicier. You’d expect Husband to be relieved, right? Nope. He played his sulking card, complaining that she made him look bad, oblivious to the fact that his own refusal started this hot mess.
A Few Red Flags Never Hurt Anybody, Right?
When folks saw this story, they couldn’t help but point their fingers at her husband and call him a narcissist. Research suggests that narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) affects males more than females, so what people are saying might be true.
As per HelpGuide, “People with NPD are extremely resistant to changing their behavior, even when it’s causing them problems. They tend to turn the blame on others. They are extremely sensitive and react badly to even the slightest criticisms, disagreements, or perceived slights, which they view as personal attacks.”
Now, that’s just what happened in this situation, where the husband blamed OP after she invited her mom when it was all his fault. Some netizens also pointed out that he was just controlling her by exerting his power and upsetting her on such an important day. Others also mentioned that he was trying to cause friction between friends, just so he could isolate her.
Choosing Therapy has stated that when a husband tries to isolate you from your loved ones, it’s a clear sign that he is controlling and using tactics to maintain an unequal sense of power within a relationship. It looks like the netizens were right, after all.
Forget Him and Have Fun!
Many of them advised her to forget him, just attend the wedding, and enjoy herself. They felt that it would be more fun without him, anyway. Some also asked her to straightaway dump him. OP replied that she had contemplated it before, but didn’t find his behavior bad enough to take that step and uproot her child’s life.
However, she also realized that her being unhappy was reason enough to leave him, and it’s quite fair. Even people stressed that this moody and sulky behavior was too much to put up with in the long run. But then, she would have to bear the brunt of the finances on her own, which she felt was a barrier to taking this step.
A Sticky Situation
Well, it’s quite a sticky situation she’s stuck in, isn’t it? What would you have done in her shoes? Let us know in the comments below!
